thinspo is killing us slowly and unnoticed

after getting bored at studying, i got to some wierd chanel on youtube that were showing tips on how to die slowly.

Litterly, dying. It said “thinspo –  tips” the video itself was horrible, i was like is this a My story anorexic video with sad music? Well, it was a video on how to get anorexia. then the tips, dont even get me started – every other picture of a blurry girl who were bones and ribs in skirts was followed by a text, or tips as she called it. I thought wow this must have gotten pretty bad reactions at the coments section. i never been so wrong ONLY good coments agains mine, people are looking (didnt even know this existed) for ana-buddy (anaorexia buddy who will help you starve yourself a.k.a support your way to death and pain and illness and sickness and mentaly breakdown) yeah, great buddy. here are some coments:




dont you find this, horrible? These girls are YOUNG AS HELL. mostly 13 years old, and so near the deep shit. ive seen many people suffering from this, its called suffering for a goddamn reason, these thinspo videos just… triggers shit. I hate it. they are “helping eachother”…. what? no. They think they will get new friends, boys will love them, they will be special and their social status will increase so much. No –  of all the stories (many) i have ever heard it always have the same end. There are no stop in not eating exept getting help or die. choose yourself. there is no happy ending, actually you will loose friends and your social status cause you will escape from reality to just count those calories and not eat, dont want people to see you, feel you, coment you. Run from the mirrors and feel the pain in your bones every time you try to move, is that what you want? Give me a goddamn reason to change my mind. 

you can compare it to drugs, sounds fun? In the start maybe, but when youre going down that road, there are no return until you hit the stop signs that gives you two choises  – get out of here quick or keep going and then you cant turn back, never. Remember all the girls at those thinspo pictures doesnt represent what you will look like 100 pound lighter, its like regular pictures, just becasue you have the same thigh size as them you will never look the same (not in a bad way, just becasue you dont look as the once in the pictures doesnt mean your ugly, no the otherway, you are so much more prettier than adobe photoshop) so just fuck everything, get your ass up and say Hola to the new life, a life without pain, lonleyness a world of perfection where you can have a dinner with your friends and laugh instead of being on your room crying. I belive one day it will be over, with all of this. but it starts today, not tomorrow. 


älska Håkan Hällström

Johnny was Eve’s heart flame
He was the sun when it dawns
He was the park in spring

and we sat on the grass
Which grew as the sky
Bengen pulled past late
Bengen trawls than

Johnny , you and I should start up a band
let it explode in the sky
It’s hard not to cry
When I think of the two of us now

For you were the sunshine
And I was alone

Johnny with amphetamine
I sat in the back seat
You took me for a ride
The radio was on

Can you dig the e locomotion
Too much revolution
Johnny I like you
You have a black cloud over you

and we rode in central Malmö on a Monday morning
Fifteen cars, fifteen restless truck drivers
freakin ‘ doctors , twenty-five constables on the street corners

And you were the sunshine
Johnny I was alone
You were the sunshine
Johnny I was alone

When I was drowning
I thought of you
You said you wanted to die
You wept behind the door

and I lay under the bed
I heard you
Eva , I need you
More than I want you

and I want you for old time’s sake
You did not mean anything
But the wind was never cold

For you were the sunshine
I was alone

You were just around the corner in your neighborhood
You were just around the corner in the neighborhood – Everywhere

know that i need you more, i adore you

hey guys, happy wendsday!

I just have to ask – have you seen the Disney movie Frozen? i doubted it first, but now i seen it twice in less than 2 weeks… hehe. Its animated and its about two royal sisters, one older called Elsa (the queen) and her little sister Anna, the movie is taking place in Norway i would say, back to the story, Elsa has magic powers with snow, she can make snow and she must hide it from her little sister anna after an accident happened, so Elsa shuts Anna out from her life for year and Anna dont know why. how the story continues? Watch and see!

xoxo Image

all i want for my birthday

im going to give a little shoutout to my friend who is having his birthday today, happy birthday!

but also, im not having mine in a long time (few months left) but i do remember my old one, the last one. it was horrible. litterly. i belive i cryed for about 1.5 hours staright becasue it was so fucking bad. Im not talking about the gifts (the gifts were awsome) and some of the people were, but the whole situation was just wrong. Call me old fashion but i think birthdays are special and holy and you know, it happens once a years and its importent to me. what happended?

imagine a normal birthday, just the whole situation and then if you think of the opposite – thats how mine was. What im saying is that it could have been not my birthday cause thats how it felt + worse. i spent my morning in greatness and then i went to hell. i dont even think people who stands me close said happy birthday, i dont even think they knew…? And if they knew which i know some of them knew, they didnt even bother caring and be that happy person you be at anybody who has its birthday that day. i got ignored, which is one of the worst thing you can do to a person eye to eye. I got more love from people who wrote on my facebook wall than i got in real life. but thats not it right? no, no, no, did i mention i spend my next 3 hours singing happy birthday to another person who didnt even have their birtday date that day, and sit around people that was like… “no we dont care about you” i was there to see one person i care about the most in this world (one of them) and this person was awsome but all i wanted was to fucking run away and i did, i couldnt stand it anymore and i went the fuck out of that place to not come back in weeks and just as im leaving a person drops “i heard it was your birthday today” pretty loud (people heard it) and guess what?  ONE fucking person said happy birthday but i dont give a shit so i just slamed the door and runned. 

what can we learn from this?

dont be with people that you know doesnt really care

dont even mention its your birthday to them

dont go to places where you dont fit in. 

the end. 

where have you been all my life

So where are my daily readers? i checked and i saw that most of my common readers are swedish, wonder why actually… and them Mericá, i can see that. we´re so global. ees


But thsi isnt the main thing i wanted to take up a day like this, the mainly thing i had to share is youtube attached. Its my barbiedoll Blndsundoll4mj

you wanna be on top

the once who mind doesnt matter, and the once who matters doesnt mind




so hopefully i catched your attention with this stunning girl(s) mostly is alena shishkova and the “real life barbie girl valeriy” and her friend, most people would probebly be like ughh plastic surgery and thin waste and that barbie look sooo fake that im going to shot myself okey- fuck off. I dont care i love it, its my view of a close perfection, that flawless bombshell look that just screams perfect, too me, but i can also say that other “normal” looks is beautiful. you dont have to look like the once on the picture for me to think of you as lovley, no thats not my point at all but i do have to say that i belive that the barbie look is stunning. And im probebly not talking in the right theme right now… i should nowdays say “looks dont matter its the inside” thats bullshit, seriusly. The OUTSIDE of a person is a huge part of the person so why ignore it and say you dont care? Its not like you dont see it so why pretend like nobody even have looks? thats just rude. yes the inside of a humans thoughts are very important, it makes the person but im so sick of that bullshit talk that people doesnt even seems to see a persons outside, some people work very hard for their outside cause it makes their inside feel better so not appreciating that and just say “i dont give a fucking shit about your look…” its very rude. Its wrong to pick your friends by their look, in that case you should pick them by their persenality.

people who say they doesnt care about look is either lying or they are very ugly and have no choise to be picky


thats a line from a great movie about a guy who look very good and say it to a girl who keeps talking about the inside matters the most and hes against it partly, im not against it, i just say what i think and what most people think but as soon as you say it out loud people fake rage like the world falls apart. Ugh. xoxo