but after all, youre my wonderwall

sonny, you are my fucking hero, since the first day i got to see who you were, ive been loving you. You make the best, and hear me, the best shit ever, you as a person is fucking amazing, youre fucking beautiful, one of them pretty gang that exist in our world. You fill it up like noone else, i belive that many people feel the way i do about you now, but how to say it?

i said maybe, you gonna be the one that saves me? But after all, youre my wonderwall.  Thank you.

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i feel you creepin

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                                                                                               my fucking hero. i like you, love you, bye.  xoxo

dont you bring me down today!

Hey dear dinasaurs! Im sorry for the lame update list (like there would be one) but i feel all the blogs going down, i mean the youngsters blog. Where i live the normal blogger is about 13-21 years old and all of the sudden (like today) people realize that “shit i got 99 problems but a bitch aint one” and they disapear in to this darkhole AKA normal life. Speaking of the normal life yesterday was great, we where on this awsome big partáy where there where soo many peps! These two last weeks i´ve been spending lots of hours with awsome people, (both people i know and dont) and i met some girls that i feel are amazing and boys that you can spread on a sandwitch, something like that. Maybe thats what faith wanted me to do, get new awsome friends when i lost one friend (that girl ive been talking about) Cuz now that i lost one, i got so many more, is that you destiny? Like back then it was rought, but NOW its totally…awsome. I am more now who i want to be then i was weeks ago. I got to meet so many new people, party every weekend, talked to people i love, get to know my family better, talked to the cutest guy in the world (aww) bought new clothes and just see life in a new view, thank you! xoxo

Hannah Montana

Imageso, im laying here watching good ól hannah montana Episodes, well its good dont judge me. Even though the jokes seems more…whats the word? Less good. If you wonders what episode im watching its Hannah Montana S03E23-24 i miss the days when Disney Channel was magical and full of good programs, now its… i dunno. I loved Hannah Montana, and i still love her. 🙂

 

 

and then pretend like nothing happended

I have three things to say. Oh wow what a  magnificent start. 

First thing is, im sorry for not telling how much i love you that often, two, that song lyric (its…yeah…special) third thing is one of the thoughest things to do here. 

  1. Numero uno. i love you guys, not only you reader also the people around me. You know you meant alot to me, and i love you. Espeacially you friends, when im with you friends i feel completed. Youre awsome and fantastic and incredible, wonderful, beautiful, so fucking good. I can honestly say that i wouldnt be half the person i am today without you. Thank you for always be there when i need you and make me laugh and smile. You guys are me.                       

    2. Numero dos. this is a part of the song that maybe can be made for atleast one part of all the realtionships all around the world, even friendships and lovers. “

There was someone else beside you when I got home (home)I do not want to be That One Who is that one
so baby I just pretend like nothing happened
pretend like nothing happened
pretend like nothing happened
it does not want if he sleeps in our bed (bed)
I can change all the sheets Ago
and then we can
pretend like nothing happened
pretend like nothing happened
pretend like nothing happened

     3. Numero tres. One of the toughest things wehn you log in on wordpress is not to remember your password, no its no figure out what to wright about. You see, I want something interesting to say to you and that does not always pop up 1000 times/day. No.  So when you get to that start “new post” you just take a deep breath and press the keyboard. hmm its magical that some people wright 11 post each days, even though some of them are only pictures, fun facts, todays do, and clothing and etc. well, maybe thats the secret.                             

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What kind of espanol this was (numero uno, dos, tres…) is very unclear, but… sue me. 

let it burn

let it burn

Today was a good day. Maybe i should use that meme right now? hmm.
I laughed alot today because of the awsome people around me, though i had a small thing happened today/yesterday was that a cute guy have been texting me for a while, he does not live in my town (its kind of close but it takes a few hours to go there) and ive never met him, so i havent really bought a ticket because ive only texted him for a few months and i dont know him and i dont think they would let me go eitherway! So this guy textes me and says “come here”, i say “yeah maybe…” he be like “no, goodbye” i said goodbye as well cause i didnt actually get what he meant. Then this morning he textes me and says:
– you will never come, he said.
-come her you then, i said.
-well, bye.

I just wanted to scream something that you shall not scream, i was so mad! Not mad-mad just mad of the stupid situation that been crossed, WHAT THE HELL? why cant he come, and “goodbye…?” who says goodbye i dont want to talk t you like a snap? it happened in like 5 minutes it feels like. Stupid people. (not you dinasaurs). Ugh. xoxo

your hometown blond beutys

I think blonde hair is sooo gourgeus, no homo now but seriusly, to me these girls are so look-alike and their all beautiful and yes, one of them thing that they all have in common exept theire hair color (yes nicki minaj changes all the time but shes the queen so whatever) is they all are a model trigger, you see them because they dare to wear whatever. Girl power! 

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things that hurts – novel

“i hope you know, that this has nothing to do with me”

like a gun shot it hit me. Right in the face, right side of the already blue-red chin. I couldnt see anything because of the tears falling down and created a puddle on the woodenfloor that was covered with red dots of blood. “you know this is your fault” he whispered right next to my ear. When i didnt answer he grabed my shirt collar even harder and pulled me up from the floor and said louder “did you understand me?!”. I nooded quickly and closed my eyes. “good” he replied. He let lose of my collar and stood up straight. with that smile that only he could do he smiled to me as he patted me on the shoulder and said “i hope you know that this has nothing to do with me”. 

I waited moments i couldnt count, i breathed slowly. I felt the pain through my body when i tryed to stand up and on 

unsteady legs. I went down the spiral staircase that led to the kitchen. As soon as I came down the stairs I was greeted by stares from the other men and their wives. I pulled back the side of my hand against my cheek to wipe away the blood. I could see him smile at me with the same smile on the other side of the table. I felt the heat rose through my body. He waved to me and I was drawn by a magical force against him. The other wives looked with disgust at me as They touched their covered sores on their cheeks and neck. I sat on his lap and looked him deep in the eyes. I could see the other men smile teasingly against him, he smiled back and said triumphantly “you can teach an old dog to sit.” All but I laughed.
when the evening come to an end and the night had taken shape and we were completely alone, he put his hand on my shoulder gently and led me up the stairs to the bedroom. I put myself slowing down in bed and felt the pain came towards me. “I love you” he whispered next to me and turned out the light. seconds, minutes, hours went and I stared up into the gold-painted ceiling as always.

Suddenly I get up. Standing strong on my legs and go straight out of the room, slamming the door and go with hard steps toward the stairs. I can feel a strong hand on my shoulder pulling me back but I keep going. He yells after me and try to make contact with me. just before the stairs first step, I stop.
   I feel his strong hands pushes me, but his hands just goes through me. he falls through me and starts tumbeling down. He falls hard for each step, dunks in the hard wooden until he reaches the last step. I stand still. I looked at him moments i couldnt count, waiting for that one thing. I stared in to his big eyes that were now red, if i looked deeply into his eyes, I can see him smile that smile only he could do, and that is the reason why I ever smiled. 

 

Accordning to me, this is such a sad novel, if you read it carefully and with open mind you see alot more than if you just read it because you need to. I guess you can construe it however you want but i see it as – its a girl being beated up very often by her husband, not only her, also her husbands friends and their wifes. Whenever she does something wrong he beats her up “you can learn old dogs to sit”. Why does she stay wit him? maybe obviuos that shes in love with his smile. In the end she says thats the only reason she ever smiled, even thought he hurt her so bad. does she die that night? He falls right through her like she were a ghost so i belive she died. this novel is written by me, so i am very pleased if you comment what you belived of this story. xoxo